So it's been a few weeks and for 2013 I will post more like I used to. It is a personal goal of mine to at least get you new material to read once a week maybe even twice. No need to wait to the new year to start I am starting now :) so here goes...lets chat about my love life....or the lack there of
Lately, I have been thinking a lot about what could be in store for me in 2013. I came into 2012 saying this would be my year, great things would happen for me, I would finally get that husband, and finally get that career I wanted, and so on and so forth and none of that really happened. I am still single, I am not really working in the field I would love to, ohh and did I mention I was still single.....that can kind of be disheartening to a woman. Why am I still single? I live in an area that is ridiculously over populated, with all different walks of life, huge military town with people from all over the world, I attend a decent size church with a diverse mix, I get out, I do things, I sit in Starbucks, I read books, I shop at the malls, I go out to eat, and yet still NOTHING!!
My singleness is not something I think about often so don't get it twisted. My life does not revolve around getting married or having a boo by my side. I live my life, I have fun, I do things, however with that said it is something that I find myself thinking about a lot more often this past month. Someone told me about a month ago about seeing me with a baby girl. This person described the man she saw, tall, light skinned, talked proper, was into music and some other things this person said too. I said hmmm sounds pretty good, then this person began to tell me that I already knew this particular man. I was baffled because I didn't know anyone of this description, so then I brushed it off and said that person was crazy. Shortly, after I dismissed her wacky prophetic vision, weird premonition, her physic ability or whatever it is you want to call it. I IMMEDIATELY thought of the guy that is in my "But you say he's just a friend" post. *Scooby Doo noise* HOLD DA PHONE....Could this be true? Is this the guy I am meant to be with? Nahhh couldn't be...he would never be interested in me...a guy like that? Pfft...so I push it aside and keep going about my business. But I find myself thinking about it more, I find myself thinking about him more, even having dreams....Seriously? What is really going on? Is my mind playing tricks on me? During all of this I just recently had 2 friends that I have known for 20 plus years contacting me out of the blue....male friends mind you that are professing their love for me, missing me etc. and one that I have known for a few years blowing my phone up, but then again none that I am interested in, in that manner. Why do the ones that you like don't like you but the ones you're just friends with like you as more than a friend?
In the midst of all of this....I have also been thinking about the last 5 years of my life, living in so-cal. I just celebrated my 5th anniversary of living here. Although, I absolutely love this place and want to stay here for as long as God allows, I have been tossing around the idea of..what if my husband isn't here, what if I am supposed to move? How would I know if I am supposed to move, and where would I even move to? What if I was only supposed to be here for a short time and I am supposed to travel on to the next spot and that is where I will meet my Knight in Shiny Armani? (DISCLAIMER: No I am not a gold-digger looking for some rich guy in an Armani suit lol it is just a funny on the Knight and Shining Armor that a friend of mine came up with that was cute and just stuck, also please do not think I would move for the sole purpose to find a husband these are just thoughts that are swirling around my head that I am writing out.)
Maybe this is my time of solitude, maybe I am not meant to have anyone right now, or ever. I am kinda confused on this thing and I have never been before. You know I hear stories from my girlfriends and others that say "I wasn't even looking for a man, or I didn't even want to be in a relationship, or my personal favorite, I had sworn off men completely and they all end with...and he just showed up and he was the one" CAPITAL U.G.H....Seriously, is it just that easy....okay so here is my declaration, I am NOT looking for a man, I do not want a relationship, and I am swearing off men............waiting....okay I guess it's not that easy
SS <3
Question of the day: If you are married or have a boo how were you when you met him or her? Were you looking, were you hoping, or did you completely swear off the opposite sex? Tell me your stories.....
Do you think Songstress should move....why or why not?
REALLY feelin' this song!!!!!