Thursday, September 13, 2012


My goal in embarking on this new blog journey was to write at least every other day or something similar to that. However, I saw something today that peaked my interest and got my wheels-a-turnin. I sat on it all day today, completed my introduction (thank you to those that read it) did some other things, went about my daily activities but I just couldn't shake what I saw so I'm doing what I do best....talking about it.

Who get's to define my beauty, your beauty, OUR beauty as people? What makes a person "ugly", and who are we to say that person is "ugly". Is it because they don't look like us, or their not shaped like we are, or they don't have long, curly, or wavy hair like us, or their skin isn't the same complexion as ours? Is there such a thing as "ugly" people? I firmly believe that a persons heart could be ugly, and you should know what I mean when I say that. "Out of the heart, the mouth speaks" a person can be mean, nasty, have hatred, be cold, etc. which would make a persons heart "ugly".

Taken from the word ugly means: Adjective: 1.Unpleasant or repulsive, esp. in appearance: "she thought she was ugly and fat". 2. (of a situation or mood) Involving or likely to involve violence or other unpleasantness: "the mood in the room turned ugly" 

So I ask the question again who gets to define our beauty? If someone says we are "ugly" does that make them right? Confession: I have called people ugly, more so woman than anything, but looking back on it how does that reflect back on me? So I say all of this to say, I read a story, and watched a video of a very special, and beautiful young woman, who wrote a book. This young woman's name is Lizzie and she was on the show to promote her new book. Lizzie was born with a very rare disease. She was born without Adipose Tissue, which basically means she was born without fat, she is literally skin and bones. She weighs around 60lbs and our society as deemed her "The ugliest woman in the world" Can you imagine being called that?

When I read this ad I literally cried for Lizzie. My heart broke because I can only imagine the many nights she cried because someone called her ugly, or pointed and laughed at her, or called her some other crazy names, or stared at her as if she were an alien, the kids that picked on her as a child, the adults that still pick on her today. I cried out, "why, why does she have to suffer like that?", then I played her interview video. She didn't shed one tear, she spoke with authority, and conviction. She is a woman who knows who she is and her rare disease does NOT define her. Being a woman in this world is difficult. We are so insecure and yes I said WE as in me too. We struggle with the way we see ourselves, our weight, our hair, our eyes, our nose, our hips, our thighs and on and on and on. And here is this woman with her rare disease, saying I'm okay with how I look, this does not define me as a person, this is not who I am. I was so encouraged by her and how she spoke. At such a young age, she has a voice, she has something say, she knows she is beautiful, she knows she is "fearfully and wonderfully made". There is a message in her story and as you listen and watch her my hope is that you are encouraged too, and that you think twice before you allow the word "ugly" to slip out of your mouth. Think about Lizzie!

So Lizzie, I don't know if you will ever see or read this but here is a SHOUT OUT TO YOU!! You are beautiful inside and out. You inspire me to not only be a better woman but to be a better human being. To think twice before I speak, to not be judgmental and tear my fellow sisters down, and to appreciate everyone and everything. You have an amazing heart and such passion, conviction and authority. Continue to use it for good. Your voice will be heard, we will get to know a person for who they are and not what they look like. We will "stop staring and start learning!!"

SS <3

Click Here ----> Lizzie Velasquez to read more about Lizzie



  1. Hey following u from SITS, plz follow me back @

  2. I think everyone has called someone ugly. I have. As of late I haven't really. I have been an exotic entertainer since I was nineteen. It taught me alot. When I started I was what most people wanted to see in a dancer. Skinny waist, perky, in shape. There's nothing that will knock your ego down a few pegs like the customer you've been workin on for the last hour take back the older, heavier woman with the overbite and three inches of brown roots showing. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I will never call another woman ugly because she isn't what I think of as pretty because karma has a way of smacking you down. Like karma giving me three kids stretch marks and a wide butt. LOL I have met ALOT of ugly personalities though. It's amazing what women do to each other. Following from SITS btw. Please follow me back.

    1. Dani you are beautiful inside and out even with 3 kids, stretch marks and a wide butt...hey post guys like that LOL. You are beautiful for sharing you story, for speaking from your heart and admitting you have been guilty of this as well. I think for me, after hearing and reading this story I was compelled to speak out, we have to stop being so negative against each other especially as women. I don't think out male counterparts are running around saying "hey dude you're ugly" I'm sure some do it but it's not placed out there as much as you see women do it to each other. We are so quick to shoot someone down. It's sad but I hope as people begin to read this they will have some compassion the next time they want to call someone ugly because of their appearance.

    2. What gets me is that men don't talk about each other but they talk about women to. It's 2012 and women are still second class. There have been several nights at work where I would outright ask men if they had looked in the mirror lately. *shakeshead*

  3. I cant even believe they gave her that name This world can be so cruel!

  4. Dani you are absolutely right...Everyone is so critical of women. I don't understand it. Ruby I know right?? The world is just that cruel. My heart broke for her